*smacks self*

well now that im sober i pretty much fully regreting last night. if i could go back and do it over. no first beer and yes to another game of monopoly. but you make bad decisions and you have to live with them. thank goodness for forgivness. i went to the coffee shop and talked to my homie rocky whos also my next door neighbor. told him about my night and how i pretty much felt like a useless piece of garbage. and hes was awesome as usual. told me some really cool stuff. and i was like ya ive been so focused on knowing god like scientifically but not hungry in the spirt. so today i was like im gonna take this screw up as an eye opener and really refocus my dedication to personally knowing god. and having him in my life. that makes me feel better. and im not gonna drink. i hate it. i dont even kno why i do it. *shrugs* either way todays gettin better. on my walk to the coffee shop i pushed my nextdoor neighbor in his wheelchair. that kicked my ass. but it was good. and he needs to get out more. hes recovering from a gun shot so ya. well i dont kno i think im gonna read and then maybe write more. if you see another poem youll kno i wrote more. if you dont youll kno i didnt.